I’ve been drowning in false seas
that perpetuate the colors you want to see.
If I wear a mask, or maybe three
I hope it hides the reality.
I dare not know what you’d think of me,
or if you’ll doubt my abilities
I tremble in waters in the shallows below,
coated in blankets of green.
The moments in where I write, I think of you. I think of the security I feel when I’m close to you. I feel the joy of what it’s like to feel alive. And with every button pushed or letter written, I think of us. Of how perfect we are together, just how each letter belongs to the next, I belong to you. Whether it makes sense to others or just me, we’re free. Just as He is in You, You are in me. Perfect together let’s be.
~My New Years resolution, well one of the many, is to have a deeper faith. Faith that things will go the way they are supposed to go & as perfect as they are meant to be. When I’m close to God, I’m unstoppable. I gain courage, beauty, worth, and guide decisions better when my head is resting on his shoulders. Being close to God makes me feel a beauty and love I’ve never felt in any other way. And I want to grow deeper in it. There are many beliefs and many faiths and in whatever it is you believe in, I hope you believe it with every fiber in your body. I hope your skin, bones, and heart feel it. So that when you think of it, you feel like you belong; perfectly together.
Silence and noise anoint the background while my eyes stare at you from a distance
Faded laughs fill the space between us
My tongue and words are stuck while every effort in speaking to you is discouraged from the memory of our last meeting
Our desires to be together now irrelevant
Avoidance slowly slices the outskirts of my heart
The room remains cold like your character towards me
Space is only giving us heartache and destruction
Oh to knock on your door and see you again
To feel the warmth of your cheek pressed against mine
To have your embrace in due time
It pains me that this is how it is now
No wonder the skies grew dark and the air began to freeze
Oh baby oh baby, set me free
Written two years ago. Funny how old feels can still be relevant today.
your bottom lip met mine
your fingertips knew me
muffled sounds filled the room
while we conversed with our lips
whispers of temptation lead tensions to rise
this I believed to be love
this time last year
your bottom lip left mine
your fingertips no longer know me
silence now fills the room
while our lips no longer converse
whispers from before, now lies
this I believed to be true
this time last year